New Firefox Extension Makes The Munda...
“I closed that tab about halfway into the second paragraph,” shouts Tray Barton, self proclaimed internet ADD sufferer. “I mean, all of the information on the internet excites me to the point of climax, but… I can never get through an article without spacing out and navigating away from the page to find more demotivational [...]
Disillusioned Voter Turns to Zoltar F...
Ever wonder why the system only produces horrible, unaccountable candidates for president? Many of us are aware of the lesser of two evils principle: the idea that of two bad choices, one isn’t as bad as the other, and should be chosen over the one that is a greater threat. A confused twenty-something [...]
Rudy Giuliani?s name misspelled on Fl...
Shouldn’t things like this be proofread? Well, at least the sample ballots still have a paper trail.
*puts on tin foil hat*
Disregard the Candle Party Invitation...
“The tragedy of the whole thing is that candles are so beautiful,” Chemist Benjamin Jones exhaustedly affirmed. Jones was dressed in a Batman costume, however, for the sake of truthful journalism, we decided to hear him out. “Certain types of candles emit toxic chemicals that nearly train the mind to become malleable. The high [...]
CIA Goes Web 2.0
The internet has a lot of information on it… well, that’s an understatement. It is estimated to have over 1,000 floppy disks worth of data just throughout America alone. How would a CIA agent go through all that information to find potential threats, leads on important cases and squash out conspiracy theories that might have [...]
Capital of India Becomes First Corpor...
New Delhi (AP) – Computer super power Dell has taken corporate sponsorship to the next level. Following in the proud tradition of the Coors Brewing Company, America West Airlines and RCA, Dell has decided to sponsor something on a much larger scale – a nation’s capital.
Pioneering the concept of putting your companies name on an [...]
Dick Cheney Tells National Archives H...
Well, Dick Cheney is at it again, with his wacky dance moves and delicious homemade cannoli rolls. However, the latest with the Vice President unfortunately doesn’t involve wacky dancing or cannoli rolls. Cheney, in order to greasily slip his way out of providing classified information for the National Archives, told them that he a [...]
Snooty Hybrid Drivers Are Polluting A...
The latest statement in “green” technology is without doubt hybrid automobiles. However, even hybrid automobiles still require burning large amounts of fossil fuels, regardless of how advanced the fuel efficiency is. Trey Kaitens, an expert in energy consumption, psychology and rare stamp appraising, has some startling news about the fuel consumption of hybrid drivers. [...]
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